empty

at the moment, I'm feeling really really lonely.


and once again, no one is really answering my smses or calls...although I only dare to call one person...but even that is no use.

I really don't want to feel like I'm encroaching into other people's lives........



I'm just bored out of my skull and if I don't talk to someone else other than my parental units soon, I'm going to nuts. Or take 5 minutes to remember how to talk again.


I'm just sick of this. There's all kinds of things that tells me that I'm a leader, I'm the one people follow or look up to.


You know what? It's all a bunch of bullshit.


I'm no leader, I don't know how to be a leader, and not to mention....


NO ONE EVER LISTENS TO ME!!!


this is also partially why I am reluctant, you know, the aforementioned encroaching thing. I was verbally slapped in the face about my bad habit of 'butting in'. the thing is, it hurt so bad, it still hurts today. it's one of my vulnerabilities, my sore point.

point in fact, I'm not a social butterfly. I'm no extrovert although I let loose amongst those I consider friends.


I'm no leader but these annoying things keep telling me that I am. I'm not. I've tried my hand at it and it turned out to be such a mess because no one notices that I'm there. it's so much work, and I don't think it's really worth it. I wouldn't mind being an assistant......heck, it seems more like assistant have greater powers than their chiefs sometimes...


I'm just tired of this.


Spiritually and emotionally exhausted.


that's the only way I can describe myself.







someone please answer me.