13thfallenangel

I lie too much I think, and far too easily.

Dad called me on Sunday, asked if everything was ok. 'Yep,' I replied when I knew that everything was not ok. Nothing has been alright for years now. And I'm not happy anymore, not happy with my Life, not happy with my studies, not happy with myself.

I think I've lost all traces of my discipline. Shit.

I want to die in my sleep, as peaceful as I can get. Pity I've still got a long way to go.

There's a spider in my bedroom, can't tell if it's a Redback, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was. Keeps running away from me though. Fast little bugger.

There's far too many lines on the palms of my hands for my liking. Everyone else's palms don't even have half of the lines on mine. L commented that I'm a complicated person....necessary to compliment the simpler people......which isn't all that true really, people are already complicated creatures, made even more complicated by the society and culture that they live in.

I feel like standing on the rooftop of a highrise building, standing on the ledge. For once, not feeling my acrophobia kicking in. Spread my arms wide, turn my face up to the Heavens. Feeling the Wind dance and whisper in my ears. And let myself fall forwards. Don't know if the Wind will catch me, but I hope to asphyxiate before my shell hits the ground in a bloody broken mess.