fuck myself
Aug. 16th, 2005 01:00 amyeah, i'm a messed up piece of work.
i'm a fucking bitch, i pissed off a dyslexic and i'm feeling guilty.....wonderful.....i hate guilt....i carry excessive amounts of it. ridiculously excessive amounts. this is what happens when u take away my punching bag goddammit. this is what happens. i explode. i lash out. i come equipped with teeth, claws and anything lying close makes for an improvised weapon. or i myself am a weapon.
fucking guilt. and as usual, my mouth is sewn shut. fuck this. i can't say anything back. i've been trained not to. if i confess to this kind of stuff, i usually get punished even worse by my parents. it's a wonder i still have my hearing after years and years of getting my ears burned off. fuck u stupid earthen snake and metal rabbit. fucking destructive force against a fire tiger.
fuck u mom and dad, fuck myself, fuck my instincts to run and hide, fuck my guilt, fuck my emotions, fuck my temper, fuck my life, fuck my programmed response to lash out, fuck my fury, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
and now for something in another language.
pigi mampuslah!! sia indak guna tau tak?! dahlah sia bodoh, indak berperikemanusiaan, apatah lagi bikin marah orang yang ada masalah membaca!? aku bodoh! aku sial! sia tak guna! sia dah malas dengan diri sendiri! baik baik sia pigi neraka ikut sama si tuan setan, apa gunanya sia duduk kat dunia ini? sia dah penat, dah malas, indak berhabis-habis mau meletup. letup tak letup, ada juga kejadiannya. tak betul dunia ini, sendiri tak betul, emosi tak betul, manusia tak betul semua pun tak betul!!!!!!
i'm a fucking bitch, i pissed off a dyslexic and i'm feeling guilty.....wonderful.....i hate guilt....i carry excessive amounts of it. ridiculously excessive amounts. this is what happens when u take away my punching bag goddammit. this is what happens. i explode. i lash out. i come equipped with teeth, claws and anything lying close makes for an improvised weapon. or i myself am a weapon.
fucking guilt. and as usual, my mouth is sewn shut. fuck this. i can't say anything back. i've been trained not to. if i confess to this kind of stuff, i usually get punished even worse by my parents. it's a wonder i still have my hearing after years and years of getting my ears burned off. fuck u stupid earthen snake and metal rabbit. fucking destructive force against a fire tiger.
fuck u mom and dad, fuck myself, fuck my instincts to run and hide, fuck my guilt, fuck my emotions, fuck my temper, fuck my life, fuck my programmed response to lash out, fuck my fury, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.
and now for something in another language.
pigi mampuslah!! sia indak guna tau tak?! dahlah sia bodoh, indak berperikemanusiaan, apatah lagi bikin marah orang yang ada masalah membaca!? aku bodoh! aku sial! sia tak guna! sia dah malas dengan diri sendiri! baik baik sia pigi neraka ikut sama si tuan setan, apa gunanya sia duduk kat dunia ini? sia dah penat, dah malas, indak berhabis-habis mau meletup. letup tak letup, ada juga kejadiannya. tak betul dunia ini, sendiri tak betul, emosi tak betul, manusia tak betul semua pun tak betul!!!!!!